How to Help Children and Teens Cope with Loss and Grief
Grief is hard for everyone, but it can be especially tough for children and teens. They may not fully understand their feelings, and the adults around them might not know how to help. This article will explore what daily life is like for young people dealing with loss and grief, and offer practical ways to support them.
Understanding Grief in Children and Teens
While adults have more experience with loss, children and teens are often facing it for the first time. They may not express their feelings in the same way adults do, and their behavior might change as they process their emotions.
Common Reactions
Children and teens might:
Become withdrawn or isolated
Have trouble concentrating
Experience changes in eating or sleeping patterns
Show a decline in school performance
Act out or become more irritable
These reactions are normal and part of the grieving process. However, it’s essential to provide support to help them navigate their feelings.
Grief in Children and Teens
Daily life can feel overwhelming for children and teens dealing with grief. They may struggle to find joy in activities they used to enjoy. School can become challenging, both academically and socially. They might feel like their world has turned upside down, and it can be hard for them to find a sense of normalcy.
Emotional Rollercoaster
Grieving children and teens often experience a wide range of emotions. One day they might feel fine, and the next day, they might be overwhelmed with sadness. This emotional rollercoaster can make it difficult for them to keep up with their usual routines.
Seeking Understanding
Children and teens may have many questions about their loss. They might wonder why it happened and what will happen next. It’s crucial to provide honest answers at a level they can understand. Avoid giving false reassurances, as this can create more confusion.
Supporting Grieving Children and Teens
Helping children and teens cope with grief involves patience, understanding, and practical support. Here are some ways to assist them:
Open Communication
Encourage them to talk about their feelings. Let them know it’s okay to feel sad, angry, or confused. Be a good listener and validate their emotions. Avoid saying things like, “You need to be strong” or “It’s time to move on.” Instead, say, “It’s okay to feel this way” or “I’m here for you.” This will help them view you as their "safe space" to return to when they need that extra support.
Encourage Healthy Outlets
Help them find healthy ways to express their emotions. This could include drawing, writing, playing sports, or other activities they enjoy. Physical activity can be especially beneficial as it helps reduce stress and improve mood.
Professional Support
Sometimes, children and teens need extra help to cope with their grief. Counseling or therapy can provide a safe space for them to explore their feelings and develop coping strategies. A professional can also help if they are showing signs of prolonged or complicated grief.
Be Patient
Grieving is a process, and it takes time. Giving children and teenagers the ability to process these difficult emotions on their own time is critical. The grieving process for developing minds, or anyone for that matter, is rarely linear so be prepared for road bumps along the way.
Coping with loss and grief is a difficult journey for children and teens. It’s okay to talk to them about seeking professional help! With your support and guidance from a mental health professional, they can begin to heal and process their emotions. If you have a child or teen who is grieving and you want help to get them help, contact my office to schedule an appointment for child therapy.